A time for everything

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1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 a time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
~Ecclesiastes

Rue’s Lullaby

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Deep in the meadow, hidden far away
A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray
Forget your woes and let your troubles lay
And when it’s morning again, they’ll wash away
Here it’s safe, here it’s warm
Here the daisies guard you from every harm
Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true
Here is the place where I love you.
― Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games

Too long of a moment

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But more than anything, I wanted to be able to walk away. And it seemed like the one thing I couldn’t do at that moment. Like my feet were glued to the pavement and my lips and tongue suddenly weren’t able to work. It was the moment I knew I had been waiting for, for so long. To tell him just how broken I felt and how empty and wrong everything felt without him next to me. That everything I did reminded me of him and no matter how hard I tried, nothing I did felt completely right. But to declare that I’m so strong and I always knew I would be okay without him holding my hand. That this is what life consists of. Of “I’m sorry’s” and “I miss you’s.” And I knew that we all had to fall at some point, but I wasn’t ready to fall. I tried to leap but had nowhere to land. “I guess I thought you’d come back.” I said with tear filled eyes. and I didn’t want him to see me weak, it was that last thing I wanted to show him. The pit of my stomach lurched forward and I think my heart fell out of my chest. I was never good at making statements but with nothing to lose, I had everything to gain. “what do you want me to say, Liza?” “I want you to say something. I wa- want you to know. I want you to understand and feel everything I felt when you decided to just leave. To just waltz out when the timing felt right for you. Well the timing wasn’t right for me. I woke up every morning with an aching heart. I hoped you would come back and every night when you wouldn’t, it felt like I was missing something. I want you to say you’re sorry, I want you to say you missed me. I want you to say that every minute you were gone that you wished you were here. I want you to say anything.” “babe..” he choked out “but most of all, I want you to know that I don’t need you. Because during the month that you decided not to visit or call or communicate, I found something that you could never give me. I found myself.” And in that instance, my feet swiftly turned me to face the sunset and I walked away from something I wasn’t sure two months ago I would ever turn my back on. I always thought I needed someone to love me. But loving myself was something I needed far more

Imagine the best possible

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Close your eyes & imagine the best version of you possible. That’s who you really are, let go of any part of you that doesn’t believe it.

Knowing yourself

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If you reveal everything, bare every feeling, ask for understanding, you lose something crucial to your sense of yourself. You need to know things that others don’t know. It’s what no one knows about you that allows you to know yourself.
~–Don DeLillo

Rare and addictive people

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Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best, and then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who just bring out the most. Of everything. They make you feel so alive that you’d follow them straight into hell, just to keep getting your fix.
~Karen Marie Moning

Some things I wanted to say to you

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if the horse that you ride
is blind it’s good
that it also be slow,
and please stroke it
a hundred more times than you would
the powerful dazzling one.
to be generous is one thing,
but there’s a clerk in some of us,
quick to say yes.
worry about the command
in the suggestion.
worry about smiles, and those men
whose business is business.
there are joys and enigmas
of an evening alone
to appreciate.
there are always the simple events
of your life
that you might try to convert
into legend.
did you know
a good dog in your house
can make you more thoughtful,
even more moral?
and sex without conversation,
sex that’s erotic or sleepy…
oh don’t let anybody tell you
there’s a wrong way to have it.
tell your lovers the world
robs us in so many ways
that a caress is your way
of taking something back.
tell the dogs and the horses
you love them more than cars.
speak to everything
would be my advice.
~Stephen Dunn

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